Saturday, October 2, 2010

life ain't easy

haven't visited my blog lately.. a lot of conflicts and works had to be done this past few days. i was stress, upset, tired, pressure and everything. stress because of a lot of work in school. projects, proposals, videos worst is the previous exams we had at sc;ool that reallyumade it pain inuthe ass. upset because of my love life. my long-time-relationship boyfriend is really away from me literally. he is half way across the earth. i don't know if when will i see him again. the shitty thing that really makes me feel upset was I wasn't in his future plans. it's really hard for me to accept that. i just pretend to be strong, strong enough to face my family and my friends and people around me. i don't know if i can still make this. a lot of things is in my mind right now. like, is he cheating on me? does he really loves me? God help on this! can't get over him! damn i hate him! im really tired in my life cause, im tired of doing this everyday routine, like sleep, wake up in the morning, go to school, see my friends, go eat outside with my friends, wait for the next class, listen to the boring discussion of our new instructor, go home, tend the store, open my networking accounts...etc.! none of this is new, none of it! sick and tired in here wanna go to other places! but i know that i can't. pressured! pressured at school because of damn competitions between my classmates, peer pressure.. what a shit! everything is a crap! im always not in the mood for anything since he migrate to a foreign country. what should i do now! HELP ME GOD..!

i want something new, i want something fresh in my life.. there no spice in my life right now.. and yet i haven't found the happiness that others has it already! i hope this life i have will get better soon.. i really hope!

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